Dear Beards, I'm Sorry

This is an open letter of apology to all the beards in the world, and everybody that loves beards and good looking facial hair.

Dear Beards,

I'm sorry. That's what I want to say the most. The pictures probably say it all, but I feel compelled to write a bit. I'm sorry I used your name to describe the thing that inhabited my face and neck for the last five weeks. I even thought I was clever by calling it a "Boards Beard." As you can see from the pictures, I was clearly delusional to use that sort of language. Maybe something like "Pre-Boards Patches", "Studyin' 'Stache" or simply a "Study Buddy." Loved ones would ask me if I shaved parts of it to make it look as sparce it did...no, sadly that's all I've got. You probably just laughed at me. I know that you're proud of men like those below using your name to describe their facial hair. I can only dream of one day being able to grow something like these fine gentlemen.

But I had to try, and I did think that it helped me with my studying and on the test. I felt smarter as I would pull at it thinking about different questions. I should have taken a hint that I should have shaved when the primary kids started snickering one day and saying to each other "He's growing a Moustache...a MOUSTACHE!" I'll admit that was pretty funny.

Anyhoo, once more I'm sorry that you had to be associated with that thing on my face. I'm sure it will be another 26 years before I try to grow another one. And if at that time it's as sorry as it was here in 2009, I'll be sure to call it something else. Just know I will be admiring you from afar, just as I always have done.

Sincerely,

Chris "Baby Face" Brown

One final goodbye to that thing of "beauty"