The vow of motherhood.....

Alright, it is time to fess up all you previously pregnant woman out there. They make you take a vow don't they. A vow that you will never tell a newly expectant woman what is truly in store for her until she experiences it for herself. It must be part of the delivery process. Perhaps while you await the birth of the placenta or something. They make you raise your right hand and swear on your newborns life that you will never divulge the true meanings of pregnancy. Am I right??? Because until now, these are the "meanings" I was aware of:

#1 Morning sickness. What a joke. Morning my eye. I used to think that you could solve this one by keeping a stack of crackers in your nightstand. Now I know it has nothing to do with morning, noon, or night. You can be sick all the time anytime. It will make you want to wish food were dead and sometimes even you were dead. It will give you anxiety to set food in a grocery store or even your own kitchen. Sure, I can stuff crackers in until the cows come home but in the end, it always wins. (the other day I was even feeling like Eogo in Aladdin and thinking, "If I eat one more cracker I might hurt someone"). It should be called constant nauseousness with intermittent vomiting... and if you are lucky enough an occasional visit to the EU for some fluids because you are like a two year old and can't even do the simple act of sipping water every hour.

#2 Fatigue. So yeah, I've felt fatigue. I've run long runs and had long days and been tired. But this, oh this is like sleeping 18 hours a day and still being ready for bed. This is waking up at 10:00 am and crawling back into bed for a nap at noon. This is going from working out for 1 1/2 hours everyday to missing the gym for 2 months. This is going from loving being busy to hoping your day consists of one thing: sleep. How about we call it hermit hibernation mode or something like that.

#3 Heartburn. I am lucky. I didn't even know what heartburn felt like. My esophageal sphincter is a peach....until now. Really, do I need to taste bile all day long? Do I need the tiny amount of food I finally got shoved down to sit in my throat all day just waiting to come up? Is it necessary to burp like a beer bellied sailor? Do I really need to sleep with three pillows behind my head and wake up with a kinked neck. I think it should be called burping bile burn with a twist of epigastric pain.

I just want to know the truth. Will I have to take this vow? If so, I am getting this down on paper now so I don't forget next time.

Wardrobe Shift

So I've been thinking about Linzi's wardrobe recently, and have decided that she really needs to get some new clothes. She has been gradually upgrading my wardrobe during the last five years, so I thought I'd return the favor. I've done some shopping online, and have come up with the following...I plan on buying them all, but thought I'd gauge public opinion before laying down some serious cash. What do you think...do I have good taste?

In case you didn't catch on from the above, Linzi's 12 weeks along, doing better (I'll let her share whatever details she wants to about how things have gone so far) over the last few days. We just had our first ultrasound on Monday; it is a wonderful experience to see that little alien creature for the first time, moving its arms and legs and seeming to be the most perfect little creature ever. Until yesterday I had the opinion that babies looked weird in ultrasounds and didn't understand the big deal...but my outlook has totally changed...all I can say is that it's just different when it's your own. Anyhoo, we've taken to calling the little thing Squishy, yet somehow I don't think that name will last long once it's outside the womb come April 5, 2011 (or thereabouts).